Unbearable Agony: A Personal Struggle With the Enigmatic Suffering of Cluster Headaches

It began on a overcast weekday in the morning in September 2016. I was working as a teacher, attempting to manage a new group of students, when a sharp pain erupted behind my one eye. This was followed by rapid stabs, similar to electric shocks. As each class came and went, the discomfort eased and then came back with increased intensity. Multiple times that day I left a teaching assistant with activities and ran to the school bathroom to douse my face with cold water. I tried ibuprofen, but the pain remained unbearable.

The attacks appeared repeatedly that fall, and again in spring, soon establishing an annual pattern. The autumn months were the worst, then the late winter. I could anticipate the pattern: aura in the morning, early pangs on the commute, full-on pain in class by 9.30am. In late 2019, a doctor finally referred me to a specialist and I was diagnosed with cluster headache disorder.

Cluster headaches typically start with intense discomfort behind a single eye that lasts up to several hours.

About 1 in 1000 individuals suffer by the condition, and males are more often diagnosed. Attacks usually begin with abrupt, excruciating pain around a single eye that reaches its peak within a short time and lasts for up to three hours. Attacks occur in cycles, daily or several times a day, and are accompanied by tearing eyes, sagging eyelids or face perspiration. There exists the episodic form, which arrives in periodic bouts; some patients have continuous attacks, defined by the lack of long symptom-free periods.

What connects patients is the intensity. One study scored the pain at 9.7 out of 10, higher than bone fractures or pancreatitis. Another discovered 64% of cluster headache patients experienced suicidal thoughts amid attacks; the figure fell to 4% when they were not in pain.

One patient, 74, a chronic sufferer from Pembrokeshire, isn't surprised. Her episodes began when she was a toddler. “I would throw myself on the floor and bang my head. That was put down to being a difficult child,” she says. Her symptoms worsened through her youth. Drinking in her teens, similar to many triggers, made things more intense. After drinking sherry at her graduation party, she remembers hardly being able to see on the bus home.

Her relatives often mistook her episodes as intoxicated behavior. Understanding finally came from her father and then from her husband, her spouse. “I was very fortunate to find such an exceptional person,” she says. Hobbs found clerical work after relocating, but often hid her condition. She was fired from one job, in part due to absences during episodes. Her definitive identification came in the early 2000s at a national neurology center.

Still, the failure to organize life around unpredictable attacks took its toll. She particularly hated being unable to plan social events, being seen as flaky as a colleague, and even having to be cared for by her family during the incapacitation caused by the worst episodes. “It steals from you of the small liberties we don't appreciate until they're gone,” she says. She remembers winning tickets for a significant concert, only to have an episode inside a portable toilet.


Headaches have been described throughout the ages. “The earliest account of headache originates from the ancient civilizations in antiquity,” write experts in a publication on the topic. They linked the disease to an evil spirit who attacked his sufferers' heads.

Ancient healing records propose unusual remedies for what modern experts would classify as a headache disorder. In the medieval times, severe headache was identified as a distinct condition, with therapies including bloodletting to other, more folk cures.

It was a European physician who provided the initial detailed description of a cluster-type attack. In his medical observations, he speaks of a patient “suffering with a very severe headache happening and vanishing daily at fixed hours”.

Cluster headaches were only formally classified by global headache committees in the late 1980s. From the 1960s to the 1990s, they were thought to be caused by a issue with a major blood vessel that supplies blood to the head. Prominent experts in treating the condition note this.

In the late 1990s, researchers released the results of a research project for which they had triggered cluster headaches in patients and monitored the episodes in a imaging machine. The results, published in a prominent medical publication, showed increased activity of the a brain region, which is in charge for human circadian rhythm, when patients were in pain, and a deactivation when they felt better.

In spite of such advances, diagnosis remains slow. Jamie Charteris's attacks began in 1986 and felt like “a modelling balloon being blown up behind my left eye”. Doctors thought he had a sinus issue; he underwent multiple surgeries before finally being correctly identified in 2014, after a physician looked up his complaints.

Specialists say wait times in diagnosing and treatment happen because patients are seldom seen during an episode. “You're exhausted and depressed, but not in severe pain,” a doctor says. He works by eliminating other common head pain disorders, such as migraine, before diagnosing cluster headaches. A detailed patient history is crucial: on which part of the head do signs occur? For how much time? What season? Are there precipitating factors, such as alcohol? Certain characteristics such as redness, sagging eyelids and nasal congestion help confirm cluster headaches. Once identified, patients may be referred to dedicated centers. But many first go to A&E or are given unsuitable treatments.

Dorothy Chapman, 78, has experienced cluster headaches for the majority of her adult life, although she has been free from an attack since recent years. When she was in her 20s, she had her molars extracted because dentists misunderstood her symptoms. She believes dentists still need much more awareness. When a sufferer sought help from a charity, it was Chapman who replied. I remember calling a helpline during an attack in 2021; a reassuring volunteer guided them through oxygen treatment and medication until the attack eased.

National guidelines on treatment advise that patients are offered high-flow oxygen and/or a anti-migraine drug administered by injection. No oral painkillers or strong analgesics should be used. Prophylactic options include verapamil, which apparently soothes the attacks of well-known individuals.

But consultant neurologists argue the guidance need updating to reflect a clearer clinical pathway and help general practitioners avoid misprescribing. For episodic patients, the treatment window is critical: “The duration of the bout dictates the approach.” Short bouts with infrequent episodes are managed with acute therapy alone. More prolonged or more severe periods require preventives such as certain drugs, sometimes combined with steroids. Many patients also receive a nerve block injection during a cycle – an procedure into the area of the head where the pain is that reduces nerve signals.

The official guidelines need revising to reflect a
Tony Rivera
Tony Rivera

Liam is a passionate crafter with 10 years of experience sharing unique DIY tutorials.